Dry Cabin Time

We've moved into a dry cabin this past week. For those who aren't familiar with a dry cabin, let me cover the basics.

• It doesn't have plumbing. There is no water line and no septic.
• It does have electricity.
• It has normal kitchen with oven, stove, fridge, microwave and sink. Only difference is our sink doesn't have a faucet.
• It has a privy (outhouse) outside. 
• We have our own space without neighbors pounding on the walls.
• It has a deck with an awesome view.
• We fill our 7 gallon jugs of water at a water station. It operates like a really cheap gas station.
• We shower on campus inn one of the many shower facilities (most of the wildlife research buildings have nice showers)
• We have a deal with a friend where we swap cookies for doing laundry at their house.

That just about covers it. Our place is two floors with the kitchen and dining areas downstairs and our bedroom upstairs. Here are some photos. They're taken at night so unfortunately our blinds are down and you can't see the views. Although Gordon makes up the difference with his beautiful posing.

Rant about the concept of marriage

I honestly do not understand the concept of marriage.

Preface: I am married. I got legally married to the love of my life almost 3 years ago. When I promised to marry him I considered it a done deal. I love him, he loves me. boom. then end. because of society and religion we were taught that when you decide those things that your supposed to get a paper that 'proves' those things.

A year later in a religious ceremony we promised each other our eternities.


From a religious perspective, I believe that the love and respect of two people's union is sacred and deserves a high level of respect.

From a social perspective, I believe that a union provides stability and increases health from having the loyalty of a companion. I've taken enough sociology classes and read enough peer- reviewed papers about anthropology to believe that.

I don't understand the legal concept.
I understand the benefits, like joint tax returns, joint custody of children, hospital privileges and other legal benefits, but I don't understand why these benefits exist only for married couples.

From a legal perspective, I see only a piece of paper with two signatures making a legal claim to one another. I am grateful that I have that paper, I think. I haven't had much need for it, but I used to it to change my name on various legal documents, and I had to have it for the religious ceremony (and that makes sense that you hafta promise your days before you can promise your forever, although some people skip doing it separately and promise days and forever together).

Perhaps the root of my question is: if marriage has these 3 main facets (social, legal, and religious), why do people use the social to argue the religious or the legal to argue the social. As a student of ecology, I have learned everything influences each other so the social perspective of marriage will change the legal system. And we are currently seeing this with allowing more people to get married.

But, isn't marriage a personal choice that is molded by our own beliefs in it?

I know I'm rather cynical about society, I think we have many silly traditions in society, and I wonder if most of the arguing we currently have over marriage, is due to some of these silly personal traditions. And I wonder if somehow these silly traditions are holding society back from understanding the beauty of marriage and the joy of that love and devotion. We're shoving ourselves and others into this narrow perspective of what marriage should be and expecting others to conform to our beliefs instead of letting them follow their own?

I don't understand a lot of legal matters, but I understand that we the people have the right of freedom of religion which means we can believe what ever want and follow those beliefs so long as they don't interfere with other's abilities to follow theirs.

So why are we molding other's marriages to our own beliefs?

A short list of some of the silly social traditions involving marriage:

Expensive wedding with: white wedding dress, cake in face, honeymoon, the entire family involved (because marriage is the most important day of your life and is a joining of two families)

Marriage happens when: both parties are completely mature, financially stable, ready to have children, 300% sure that is the right person (might wanna wait a few years just to be sure), and you know EVERYTHING about the partner (no surprises after marriage)

Marriage entails: magically understands personal role in marriage and role of partner in marriage, children should come soon after marriage (because that's why you got married right?), excuses for everything (getting married, staying married....), marriage is about "me" or about "him" (it's about "us"), your supposed to be the only the 'best friend' or only the 'business partner / serious one'.

Why do we hold people to our values instead of holding them to their own?